Couples Having Doubts About Marriage

A new study published by the Journal of Family Psychology shows that premarital doubts correlate with an increased rate of divorce.

Examining 232 wedded couples over four years, the study revealed that women who had doubts about marrying were 2.5 times more likely to divorce their husbands than women who did not.  The study asked participants simply whether they were ever hesitant or uncertain about marriage.  About 47% of men answered “yes” and about 38% of women did too.  In addition, the study found that 38% of couples did not have marital doubts.

Although the study is interesting, its informative value is questionable.  First, wouldn’t one expect 95% of people to have doubts about marriage?  Taking vows is one of the most important decisions one can make – you choose to share your life with another person and assume weighty responsibilities.  Marriage can work wonderfully, or it can devastate your life.  It might lead to having children – another life altering event – or ending in an acrimonious and costly divorce.  Plus, everyone has heard about awful marriage experiences and most know that the divorce rate has climbed to around 50%.  Realistically, given the range of sweeping transformations marriage brings, wouldn’t any sane person hesitate or be uncertain about whether to marry?

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Further, the researchers did not ask the subjects anything more specific than simply whether they had doubts about marriage before they took the plunge.  It might have been more useful to ask what specific doubts the participants held.  For example, whether the person doubted that her partner would make a good husband, or whether she thought he might not make a good father.  Or, they could have asked whether a partner doubted that his spouse could carry her financial burden or would ever want kids.  By informing us better about the specific types of doubt the couples had and linking those types to divorce rates, the study could have told us more about why marriages fail.  In addition, it might help to know whether the person had doubts about the institution of marriage itself and whether this belief was associated with a higher rate of divorce.  Finally, it would have been informative for the researchers to note the age when each couple married.  Because couples who marry younger are more likely to divorce, noting their ages would help eliminate the divorces that resulted largely from marrying too young.  In turn, this might increase the accuracy of the findings.    

Despites the study’s informational deficiencies, bearing sincere doubt about your upcoming marriage probably does indicate that it is more likely to end in divorce.  Another study published in the Journal of Family Issues supports this thesis as well, finding that couples who strongly believed in the institution of marriage were more likely to enjoy a happier marriage with less conflict than their counterparts.

Based on the two studies, it’s safe to conclude that someone should think carefully about any doubts he has before marrying and whether the couple can resolve them. 

               

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